Last Sunday I drove out to Bob's church. It was a good day and of course I enjoy watching him in his element. I kind of even like the feeling of stealthiness I feel when I am there. No one there knows that I am in any way affiliated with the pastor. This way I can be an impartial observer to things I wouldn't if folks knew that I have developed quite the friendship with him.
He, too, has said he likes this. I'm not too sure at how he looks at this friendship we have....but he does acknowledge the fact that he enjoys the fact that no one knows my connection to him. (On whatever level.)
So my mind kind of fast forwards a bit. If things were to really happen....and the pastor and I do become BFs or even 'partners', I think I would prefer to keep things on the downlow...at least for a while.
Bob seems to be very private. He has dated some very interesting folks along the way -- none affiliated with his churches...except one. This was the one I believe to have been the love of his life that ended rather tragically after only a very few years...Bob still talks about him in profound ways.
I guess if and when the time comes that Bob and I are a "couple"...I can cross the bridge when I get to it.
But for me....I would just be happy to be in his life....but not affiliated with his professional life.
Perhaps this was one of the mistakes I made early on with Lovey.
1 comment:
Really good post and thoughts, Frank. But keeping a distance between the spouse and the church is sometimes not an option for the clergy. Anyway, as you say, time will tell.
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