An Entertaining Evening -- ALONE!

Yes, you read the title right.

And, based on some of the lectures I've received of late, it sounds like it was in the nick of time too! LOL.

Actually, I'm seeing some solid improvement in me over the past little while that I've not bothered to share with all of you. I guess I was too busy whining and working at getting the point across that divorce sucks....change sucks.......life alone sucks.......and at times, nothings helps a body more than a good.....solid......cry.

So, now, let me explain some of the growth I've been experiencing here in the past little while. First of all, I've stopped wallowing in the mire of what used to be....or what should have been......and mourning the loss of my little family. Actually, I haven't lost my family at all......just the location has changed....the names and faces all have remained. The only person I don't really think a lot about is Lovey. You see....since September and our visit with our son before he departed for Iraq cleared the air for me. I got a lot off my chest...and I was able to tell her a few things that had festered horribly.

Then, driving to the airport to pick up my daughter....and experiencing LOVEY OVERLOAD only served to expose the fact that the separation and divorce had, in a way, made me romanticize all the time with Lovey....and to magnify the good times..... My overload showed the bad times were still very much there....and that I have, in fact, gained a lot more good, solid ground than I give myself credit for.

So, with myself feeling pretty good about myself....and the fact that I had a good doctor's report today (had a thyroid scan to see what has caused my thyroid to shut down)....eveyrthing appears normal....no nodules, cysts, or tumors on the thyroid...but it is structurally sound. The next thing I have to do in a a week or so is to have a nuclear scan. Then we'll see what's causing it to misbehave...but at this point there's nothing to be frightened of.

Tonight I did something I have never done before: I took myself to dinner and to the Gay Men's Chorus Holiday Spectacular at George Washington University in DC. I've always gone with someone as company. It was like I was afraid to do things like this alone. Tonight though, I decided to do just that and I had a grand time. The music was beautiful......the eye candy was to die for......and I saw lots of people there that I knew. They came up and hugged me.....and were happy to see me.

All this was affirming to me.

Then, I came home...to my puppy dog's wagging tail.....and he nearly licked me to death.

Hey, I'm on the mend...and continue to grow and grow. Divorce isn't easy....and old habits die hard.

But I'm on new ground now....and it feels pretty good!

Thanks to all of you who have voiced your concerns....and inquired about my wellbeing.