The Replacement

I think I have been replaced -- already!

In some respects it bothers me like crazy....but in others, it doesn't at all. That's sounds a bit schizo doesn't it?

Back when #2 spent the weekend with me....and we went down to her Grandma's for dinner near the end of March, Lovey had been "uncomfortable" with my being there. There was also a strange man in attendance who was a doctor. For the purposes of this blog, I'll refer to him as Doctor D. Doctor D spent the evening bending my ear totally off. He talked to me about everything under the sun while I was grilling the steak for our meal.

After the evening was over and #2 and I were headed to the airport, she and I couldn't quite figure out why he was there in the first place. We know that he has been married twice: divorced once.....and widowered once. He has 4 kids...all adults. He's a doctor. His mom died from Alzheimers. Mom O'lovey's only sibling is suffering the onset of Alzheimers and was recentlly placed in an assisted living facility. Doctor D has spent much time with her and Mom O'Lovey....and putting forth his opinions as to the validity of her being placed into an assisted living facility this early in her diagnosis.

This really is all well and good.

However, this weekend Doctor D was seen mowing Mom O'Lovey's yard on Saturday....and spending the entire day there. Yesterday he was at Mom O'Lovey's nearly the entire day. Finally, today as I was on my way to go visit Harper's Ferry, WV, I drove by Mom O'Lovey's around noon, to see Doctor D's SUV parked in front of the house. When I returned from Harper's Ferry, in the early evening, around 7, he was STILL there.

The clincher to all this the fact that my girls were talking to me today.....and made mention that their Mother had also spent the night at Mom O'Lovey's last night. And also that Doctor D and Mom O'Lovey and MOL's sister (with alzheimers) are slated to go visit Lovey next weekend.

It bothers me.

I suppose because of pride. I mean, I spent a hunk of time with Lovey...it's over....but it's all so strange knowing that another man is now apparently in the process of wooing my soon-to-be-ex-wife. It's not any of my business. I just need to breathe and move on.

It certainly doesn't help that I feel so alone. But I am definitely in no shape to look seriously for a partner. I'm not ready for that kind of relationship. If Lovey is, then more power to her.

BUT...I have to tell you. When you've been through what I have, and suddenly you're confronted with what appears to be your replacement, well, it hurts.

It just adds to the cauldron of other hurts and broken dreams.

All bubbling and simmering together.

Why did I have to win the lottery of heartache?