No response yet from the other side about the acceptability of the separation agreement. For someone to have been so “antsy” about getting this over with so that she could move on, I’m a little surprised! Yet, on other levels I’m not!
My attorney says that always near the end of the process like this, someone is going to get a little weird.
I guess I somehow understand. After all, it takes a long time to be thinking about separation/divorce…..then to move to the actual deed……and then when you have done all that to actually take the step of no return and sign the documents….it brings it all into the concrete here and now…..up close and personal.
I will probably have my moment of truth when it comes time for me to sign the actual final divorce document.
Even though I have seen Lovey’s darker side throughout this awful process….and oh, how her outbursts have driven into my very core and inflicted such great, unimaginable pain, when it comes time to sign the document, I will be quite saddened by it.
Why does it still hurt?
Why did her outbursts and accusations hurt so bad last week?
I suppose it shows me that for all the 25 years I spent with her, she did not know the real Frank: that gay Frank that would do nothing to willfully harm or to take advantage of anyone; the Frank who cared beyond words and tried to let it show…the Frank that obviously failed.
II feel fortunate. I do have my 3 wonderful children who have accepted me and have continued to love me unconditionally. They don’t necessarily understand the gay thing, but they still are hopeful that Dad will find the man of his dreams and live happily ever after. And, knowing them as I do, they will also love that man as a dad.
I have an excellent job….my own home……and tons of material objects…..and now….piece of mind…..sanity.
I can be myself. The days of lying and cheating are over. I’m gonna be free!
Will I hear something from Lovey’s attorney today?
Will I finally have a separation agreement that I can sign?
Will I finally be back on track to head to the final divorce?
Only time will tell.
1 comment:
Frank, in your mind you're already divorced. It's just a legal exercise, a signature. You don't need anyone's approval anymore, except your own. Go. Do what you want. Don't feel guilty about it. Maybe a little sad, but not guilty.
Think about it. Does she feel guilty for the nasty actions done? For the changes in her life that led you apart? Aside from the gay thing, you still had a pretty bad marriage. You would have been chasing skirts had you not been gay and closeted.
Peace to you, and sign that paper with the authority of Alexander Hamilton.
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