Feedback

I really do appreciate all the feedback that I have received from all of you who have taken the time to write me as a result of my post of a few days ago. It gives me insight as to who my audience is, where they are on their journey, and in general how I'm helping if at all.

It does touch me to know that I'm having some impact out there. If anything I pray that you realize that if you're gay and you're married.....and trying to come to terms with it -- there are others who have been on the journey before you....and there are others who are nipping at your heels behind you. AND, in this digital age of the Internet (God bless Al Gore!), there are so many resources out there just by searching GOOGLE......online communities of mena nd women like yourselves....and there are also communities and support for the wives of gay men.

It's just a matter of you finding the path that suits you best!

I've received a lot of comments from people about the picture that I posted that appears on my Birthday Invitation...many folks think I should use it as the "about me" section of the blog. To be honest, I'm torn by that because I really like the picture that's there already...the one with me walking down the country rode....approaching a dark curve......not knowing what's around the bend....alone and frightened. It sums up just where I was when that picture was taken.

But, I have done quite a bit of growing since then...and I'm happy to report that I'm doing pretty well.

Today was a good day. I got rid of some more junk.....and tried to organize a bit. But my allergies have flared up fiercely this week...and on top of that, today I came down with a stomach bug....that has really zapped me. So, I took a two hour nap this afternoon....and I awakened refreshed. Still I feel a bit washed out.

I received a couple of short and abrupt emails from Lovey. I can tell she is miffed about not having received an invitation to my birthday party celebration. Again, the evil me is at work. I've not fully decided whether to invite her or not. I'm still pondering it. If I did invite her it would only be on the account of the kids being here and she could see them. But really, this part is one rare occasion that is truly about ME.....and what I want for a change.

Then the appropriate questions is, "Do I want her here?"

Kind of tough to answer...given the residual anger and bitterness that have recentlly sprung to life in me.

Yes, dear readers, I still have some of that anger and bitterness I am dealing with. I being honest...and really don't need any admonishments about needing to "let it go". I am doing my best to deal with it in my own way and, if you go back and reread some of the oldest posts here, you'll see that really I have come a long way.

Twenty five and one-half years don't just evaporate over night.

But my life is moving in the right direction...and I'm learning to be happy and content.