Friday, October 31, 2014

Some Things Never Change

Well, I have a number of ads posted on a number dating sites and occasionally I get some interesting responses. But they never turn out…so, it's with trepidation that I read their responses and offer anything in return.

Today I noticed that a gentleman had visited my profile on a number of occasions. So I wrote him a quick note….and said "Hello. Just a note to say I like your profile. It resonated because I was married…..blah…blah….blah…so it has been slow going."

"Good Guy" responded by saying "We do have a lot in common. I'm not sure that we'd be compatible dating or as partners, but a new friend is always nice. Let me know."

So, I responded, with "What are you looking for?" (Keep in mind that I did not say anything to him that even hinted I was interested romantically. I had just told him that most folks on that particular site were looking for the next best thing between the sheets….and that I was looking for a whole lot more……and it is slow going."

"Good Guy" responded again saying "What am I looking for in terms of friends, or partners? The former: wide open. The latter, obviously a bit pickier and I don't think you and I would be a good match on that score."

I responded: "You certainly have a way with words. Based upon your emails I certainly agree with your assessment with one addition: I don't' think we'd be good friends. I'm picky too. Have a great day!"


Now do you see why I've learned to be content in my life as it is?

Thursday, October 30, 2014

Look Who Is Back!

After a long break, look who is back in the glow of his laptop and writing this entry!

It's me!

I know that it has been a very long time since I have written…so, I thought I'd write something tonight. As my life ontinues to settle a bit, I will start writing more frequently….I promise.

It certainly has been busy in "gay land". More and more folks are proudly coming out. Being gay is not as big of a deal as it once was. Gay marriage is spreading throughout our country…and thank God….saying you're gay does not rattle the rafters as it once did. Oh, if you're a celebrity and come out…it still makes the nightly news….but for the rest of the world, news of coming out is now a real yawner. My, how things have changed in the years since I began this blog.

I live in Northern Virginia. I'm totally amazed that we now have marriage equality. So many of my gay married friends are so excited. It's just totally amazing. We also now have gay marriage in my home state of West Virginia. I just never thought these big events would happen in my lifetime.

But here we are…and it has happened.

It's an exciting time.

Sadly though, I'm still single. I've joined a host of the dating sites. But there are so may gay men out there who love to play games. It's discouraging, so I've just backed away from it all and continue concentrating on my life. I am always working to be well and happy. And it really does work. In profound ways.

I've turned outward in ways to help people I know. I've been able to provide a safe harbor to a number of folks who have had tough things thrown at them -- mental illness….job challenges….financial devastation…and all other sorts of things. I actually have been able to see how my presence in their lives has helped them to become the best they can be.

I am very thankful for my job. I'm blessed to finally be able to acce[t and to finally like me. My self perceptions have vastly improved. I'm confident. I''m happy. When I review my life's journey, it has been filled with a lot of twists and turns. I've been very honest about my journey …the good and the bad.

But I'm still here to be able to tell you about it.

I've ramped up my church work considerably. I'm on the board of directors.

I now have two grandchildren and another set to arrive in February. That certainly has changed my perspective in a whole lot of ways.

Mom O'Lovey is still suffering from stage 4 lung cancer. She never smoked a day in her life…and here she is at age 84…fighting this disease on her own terms and making a valiant attempt to do so.

Even Lovey has re-entered my life. Some say that she is trying to return to me or to rewrite history…and is hopefully that I would consider taking her back. After all the water that has flowed under the bridge….all the hurt and all the drama, I think you all know what the outcome of that is.

So, here I am. A single gay man who is reasonably happy -- enjoying life.