Monday, August 01, 2016

Operation Catchup

Sorry to paint my life as such a bleak and dark mess based on the break up with Stan. Although at the time of my February Post he had dumped me. He had begged me to take him back....and after a period of weighing all things and despite his assurances that he would never do that to many again...including dumping me via text -- he did.

Probably the worst part of this is not only the emotional hurt, but it was also the circumstances surrounding it. Who meets up with someone on a phone app...barely knows them....and MARRIES them? Stan did. So, I wish him well....and I'm sick about feeling so crappy about it. I think more than anything, I'm dealing with hurt pride. I mean I was finally flying high with this guy....and wham....

Here I am.

WOW.

So there are some other things to update you all on. Mom O'Lovey passed away on March 27 -- Easter, her favorite holiday. She battled her lung cancer valiantly and final succumbed. It was painful to watch her deteriorate...and more importantly, it was even worse to say goodbye to her. She was the glue that held the O'Lovey's together.

Her house is now for sale...and under contract. Lots of drama about the sale of that house....won't go into it here...but hopefully in the next month or so, the property will pass into other hands. Whenever I leave my house...if I drive into DC, I pass by her house and it just feels so sad to know that Grandma is no longer there. If I need to go into Annandale or Fairfax or something, I pass by her grave. It's awful to know that her remains are there.

I just can't seem to get away from my grief.

In the early days of this blog, I was so resentful of that family....and hurt...because I felt so left out. I had so much anger and bitterness with Lovey...I could barely see straight. But as time has healed the wounds, and I have recovered from that awful period....Mom O'Lovey remained faithful and steadfast in her love and support of me. In fact, she said one time to me, "Well just because my daughter was silly enough to divorce you, it does not mean the rest of us have to divorce you too! I still consider you as a part of my family...and for however long I am here, you're in the family!"

And I was.

Tomorrow I fly to Music City USA, Nashville, TN. You see my youngest twin daughter is getting married on Saturday. I've blown what feels like a fortune on it. We're having 130 some guests. It's going to be at a mansion in Tammy Wynette's neighborhood. I've secured the services of a videographer who will use drones to do flyovers, weather permitting.

I'll be there with Lovey, all my children, my grandson, and all of Lovey's sisters....and the newest members of y family, the groom's family. They've been told that I'm gay....and from what I hear, they are fascinated with me. I've been ordered to keep the rainbow colored moo-moo at home. LOL.

How I'd hoped to share the day with a man who I thought was my long awaited beloved. But, alas, I'll be alone.

So I fly out tomorrow and will enjoy myself and use it as a moment to being all over...and put Stan to rest.

1 Comments:

Blogger Paul said...

Hope you had a great time at your daughter's wedding. Sorry Stan was such an ass; you are certainly better off without him. Please do not take him back.

And you will find someone - don't give up.

12:39 PM  

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