Monday, July 06, 2015

Gay Marriage!

Gosh...I never thought I would live to see the day that Gay Marriage would be the law of the land...but on June 26, 2015 it became just that! I nearly fainted when it became legal in the Commonwealth of Virginia and in my Home State of West Virginia, but my goodness...this is even more huge!

In the 10 years since Lovey's and my separation, the tide of acceptance for us gay folks has exponentially changed. I'm no longer ashamed as I was....or feeling second class.

It's amazing that as a gay man, I now have the option to marry the man I love...if I'm ever fortunate to find one. But it's not a priority. If it happens, it does. So you all just keep those positive thoughts and prayers headed into my direction.

In the meantime, I've been dealing with some medical issues. I've finally gained the upper hand on my diabetes. My A1C (long term sugar levels) is as 6.4 at last check. Still working to bring it down further...but I'm pleased. Last fall it got up to 14.9...which is definitely BAD.

My cataract surgery on my right eye is scheduled for August 4. I look forward to this happening and being able to see crystal clear again. Once this is complete...and if all goes well, my left eye will be done next.

On another front, last week I decided to return to GAMMA (Gay and Married Men's Association). It's an organization for gay and bisexual men who are or have been involved in a "straight" relationship with a woman. (Frank raises his hand.) I think the whole gay marriage thing has dislodged some issues that I need to deal with. Plus it never hurts to expand my network of friends.

At the first meeting I went back for...I made several new friends....and I'm amazed at how much I have matured and grown from the days I originally went to GAMMA. It was encouraging to me to see this first hand as I sat and listened to some of the men's horror stories of their treatment during their divorce....or as they are still living with their wives post disclosure.

While I could relate to their stories, I have a more interesting perspective now. The pain of separation is a distant memory...the hurt...the bitterness.....the uncertainty have all melted away. So, I'm now able to look back with a degree of objectivity. Yes, I have some real regrets. I never set out to deceive my wife....but I was listening to folks who were telling me how marriage would "reset" my thinking and "fix" me from being gay. I now know that this advice was faulty and misguided.

I pray that this kind of advice is now passé.

It is not good for well meaning Bible Thumping Christian to assume that "God's Plan" is one man....one woman....one lifetime. There is no guarantee that anyone who gets married will stay married until they die -- gay or straight. Things change....times change.....culture shifts.

Having two people of the same gender in a loving and committed relationship is not evil. If it is...it is the only time that I know of where a loving relationship is considered sinful and wrong....when Jesus proclaimed that they greatest commandment is love.

It just doesn't make a lot of sense to me.

So we now have Gay Marriage. Western Civilization did not end. Fire and brimstone did not rain from heaven.

Let's see what happens next!

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