Wednesday, February 08, 2017

AND FINALLY -- Some Good News

Hi all. Yes, I have been missing in action. It never is my intention to not communicate with you all, but life is busy and following the last relationship collapse, I was quite devastated and needed to lick my wounds. So, in typical Frank fashion, I have immersed myself in my work, in my church work, and in my homeowner's association duties. I've also had some health setbacks that I've had to focus on. The diabetes is doing what it eyes and my kidneys. So, I'm laser focused on trying to get back some of my health that it has taken away from me.

So, even though life has dealt me a few setbacks, I've had some very good things to happen.

First, as the vice-moderator of my church I'm in the lofty position of serving as my pastor's boss! I did not vy for this position, but somehow I have found myself in this role. So, I've worked very hard to do the best job that I know to do. Over the past several years, my church has struggled to stay afloat...and when I got the job I currently have, I thought I'd be in charge of shutting down the place and liquidating assets and walking away. But, to my surprise, the ship is turning and appears to sailing into the proper direction. At year end, for example, we closed the books with a surplus of $67,000. We've also increased our attendance dramatically, and our membership has grown!

I am so amazed and I can't wait to see what God does next.

Last Summer, the man I had been dating for almost a year dumped me abruptly. He met some guy on one of those silly telephone apps. They had an encounter and must have been something because the very next day after, they ran to the courthouse and got MARRIED! Yup! MARRIED! Kind of took my breath away. It also left me feeling a bit like chopped liver...after all, I gave him everything I could possibly do over almost 12 months...and MR WONDERFUL wiped all that out in one session of lust....or passion....or whatever....and they got married!

It played with my head. I felt as though something were wrong with me. It took several weeks for me to finally come to the conclusion that the breakup said a lot more about him than it did about me. So, I moved on...and figured it was time to fold up the rainbow flag and put it away and prepare to live my life alone.

So I immersed myself in all my activities. I didn't even allow myself to dream about someone, because, well, it was not in the cards. Well, one former flame did have a heart to heart talk with me to say, "You do know that I still love you, don't you?" I was taken totally off guard by his declaration and all I could muster was, "No, I didn't know that?" As the conversation progressed, I had to tell him that the ship had sailed and there would be no going back. He left me....he had his chance...and he told me I wasn't worthy at the time...

For Christmas, I was invited, along with my children and grandson, to join Lovey to celebrate "as a family" in her house in Newport News, VA. After all she has been through with the illness and long goodbye of her mother, and the very traumatic liquidation of assets and settling of the estate, I thought it would be a good thing for us to all be together. So I agreed.

On Christmas Eve, I was bored. The rest of the family was out doing some last minute stuff, and I was at the house alone. So to pass the time, I decided to see what guys were in the area that I could admire. After all, my thought reflected back on my former bf and the fact that he had used this very app to get a new husband! So I signed on.

As I looked at the very nice guys, one man totally caught my attention. I thought about writing him, but then I thought that would be way too bold.... So as I continued to study his picture and read his profile, I decided to use the WOOF feature. It's l basic flirting. Most of the guys I WOOF at tend to ignore me or block me.... So, I thought with his looks he would block me, but at least I was having fun WOOFING.

I thought no more about it.

Imagine my surprise -- no SHOCK -- when bright and early on Christmas Morning, he had written me a nice text message to say hello. Over the course of Christmas Day, we chatted back and forth at length. I learned his name was Chris. I found out that he had been a former pastor, and that he had been married to three different women as he sorted out his gay feelings. He finally accepted his identity, came out, divorced, lost his ministry, and now he was working in the Midwest on contract in a real estate firm. Originally from the Virginia Beach area, he said that he was wanting to come back to Virginia, because of his kids.

We continued becoming acquainted. We then moved our texts to phone conversations. He sounded like a normal, nice, and sweet man. He turned out to be two years older than me. We also found we had mutual friends and something ignited between us. By the Wednesday after Christmas, we had met face to face.

We scheduled a breakfast meeting at Bob Evans'. It was as if we had known each other for years and we wound up talking for three hours! Since then, he has made a cold call to the Northern VA area and was amazed to connect with people knew of him and his reputation. They flew him here for an interview and was offered the job on the spot! The office is only two miles from my house.

So he has signed a contract and will be here beginning March 1. We have wound up totally smitten with each other, and both feel that this is going to go the distance. I'm shocked because I had so given up on finding someone like this.

He is everything I had ever hoped for on my wish list...AND MORE!

The most amazing thing of all is that in typical gay relationships, you go to bed....then ask questions later. Sad but tru But in our case its more like an old fashioned courtship. We have found a lot of common ground that has drawn us together in very profound ways. We fell in love first before sex was introduced into the mix. In all my years on the planet...and in my nearly 26 years with Lovey, the seven years with Lee (Dirty Little Secret), the 12 years with ZACH, the interlude with Stephen, and the nearly one year with Stan, and all the other encounters I've had in between, I can honestly say that I have never had feelings quite like this! I now understand why love songs are written.....what makes up a love letter......and the desire to spend time with my beloved.

I am so goofy. But the happiness I have is beyond words. It feels right.....very right.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Glad things are looking up!

7:40 PM  

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