Sunday, August 12, 2007

Monagamy In Gay Relationships

While at the retreat, I had an opportunity to discuss a topic that had been on my mind for a while.

Is there such a thing as monogamy in gay relationships?

Many gay men say they are monogamous, but it has appeared that monogamy has different meanings for different people.

So we talked about it at the retreat. There are a number of such couples in my church. When I could get them alone, I asked them...what does monogamy mean to you?

Perhaps I'm actually Pollyanna, but one day I would like to be in a relationship where I have a one and only. By this I mean ONE and ONLY. But I wondered if this ever happens in gay relationships. AND...if I'm just being weird.

Every gay male couple at the retreat I talked with assured me that their view of monogamy was "You can look.....but don't touch." This means no extracurricular physical activity. Period. End of discussion.

They also assured me that they had many couples in their spheres of influence that view monogamy in the same way.

So I supppose I'm not so far off base.

Will it happen for me?

Only time will tell...

2 comments:

Marlan said...

Well, you did poll a church group, what did you expect?

Anonymous said...

For me, I have maintained that level of monogamy in my marriage, but I am not sure that I would even ask it of a gay consort, should I be so fortunate as to ever have one. I think that I would want him to be with me because he wanted to be there not because of some commitment that he had made some time in the past. Of course, that means that one needs to take certain precautions with one’s health but I think that is a small price to pay. Just my personal view – not intended to be projected on any one else.

Rick