Misunderstandings

I hate misunderstandings.

Part of the problem I had with Lovey was that I felt wronged....and so misunderstood. It wasn't until this past weekend that I finally got a lot off my chest with her. I also addressed this fact of feeling so misunderstood.

From the comments I've received over the course of keeping this blog, I have had some commenters make statements to me, that point to the fact that I have been misunderstood in some of the things I say here.

Communicating one's feelings through writing I guess leads to misunderstandings.

Just like some people when interviewed by a journalist, wll invariably say, "I was quoted out of context!"

Senator Larry Craig feels misunderstood. After all, we all know he's not gay. He just has a "wide stance" when it comes to his using airport restrooms.

But I guess misunderstandings are just a part of the human condition. We judge ourselves by our motives and our thoughts.....but we judge others by their actions.

I've found that it helps to try and understand where the other person is coming from when something happens. I try to dig deep and to factor in their situations. Are they feeling okay? Are they stressed? Is something going wrong for them elsewhere that is making them behave in the manner they have.

This always lessens the chance for me to go into full attack mode.

Perhaps this is why that I was willing to spend so much time with Lovey this past weekend.

Willing to listen to her talk about what things have been bothering her.

Willing to hear what today's reasons are for the divorce.

It helped me to remain calm and to say what was on my heart. As painful as some of the things we discussed were, it helped me to remain relatively calm and speaking evenly and quietly.