Thursday, July 10, 2008

Silence!

I've been so very busy today that I have not had two seconds to myself. BUT...I have been monitoring my cell phone and email to see if the MYSTERY MAN called or wrote.

He certainly didn't drop by the office today.

But, he does seem to prefer to communicate electronically...which is fine. My only concern is that I haven't heard anything from him today.

It makes me wonder if maybe I said too much yesterday and perhaps scared him off.

In any event...it certainly has been fun...to think about the possibilities...and playing little scenarios in my mind -- of how I'd like for feelings to surface....and to be discussed....

Wondering how my kids would respond to him.

Wondering how my parents would respond to him.

Wondering how my friends at church would respond to him.

Wondering how my other relatives would respond to him.

Then I realized something kind of profound. There are no hard and fast rules for gay relationships. We don't have role models. I mean, in the straight world generally the man and woman date.....and then grow serious.....and then become engaged......and get married.

How does all this work for two gay guys with their own houses and careers? At what point does a relationship begin.....and then the dating......and does that mean it's time to move in together.....and have a commitment ceremony.

Gosh, I don't even know if I even want to go that far.

So, here I am with all these thoughts and concerns....and I haven't heard from this man all day. I really have no concrete evidence that he is even giving me second thoughts "that way" other than my gut feeling.

After spending some significant time with him, I should get an idea.....

I've got to be prepared for acceptance or rejection.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Frank Frank Frank … are you staying in the moment having fun learning about who this man is and how he is fitting into your life or are you spinning “what if” fantasies that have little to do with what is? If the latter, is it not likely that you will be disappointed when he does not follow your favorite script which is only in your head so that he can not possibly have read it? And if he does not follow this phantom script, will you take that as rejection?

Rick