I think I have a chemically triggered depression going on in my head today.
Diabetes causes all kinds of things....not to mention the changes in mood....and here I sit.
I've been up since 5;00 a.m. here on a Sunday Morning. I've been out taking care of some errands....and now that I'm back, I should be getting ready for church. But my profound negative mood is tempting me strongly to just stay home...and not do anything but work on my house.
All morning, I've been fighting wave after wave of negativity. It stems from my lot in life of being a single, divorced, gay, white, older man. It spreads to the fact that my daughters are many, many, miles away. It seaps into the crevass of my son possibly having gotten a girl pregnant and will be heading to Iraq. It then sweeps over the fact that I'm an only child, with parents who are aging....
I'm a mess.
So, I guess, rather than just sitting here and letting the sadness drown me.....I need to get off my butt and go to church....and stop the pity party.
2 comments:
Hope you got out and went to church. It gives you another perspective to go out and be with other people. Introspection can be great and all but when it turns into a pity party it's time to get out of the house.
Your previous post on being ALONE led into this I'm sure. But don't worry, you are a great guy and you'll find just the right person eventually. It's probably good that it takes a little time since you just got divorced.
And I recommend you let those 2 guys know of your interest. Just be careful of those rebound relationships...
Sounds like a good idea. When you get into these ruts, I think it's always best to go out and find people to be around that can bring your spirits up. Starting a project with some loved one in mind (daughter/son etc) can always help too, like writing them a letter expressing your love for them etc. Or make plans to go somewhere new and exciting. In any case, try not to let it linger!
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