Thursday, March 08, 2007

Is EVERYBODY Gay?


I am scratching my head a lot these days.

No, I don’t have lice! LOL

Being gay sure does make life very interesting. When I think of all the energy and time I wasted fretting about this very fact and worrying about not being “normal,” I get very, very tired. Especially when I think of how bad I beat myself up….and considering myself to be “ugly.”

One of the things that I have been most fearful of is the fear of being alone as I get older. “Who would want me?” I often asked myself.

Several of my gay friends have said that I should just be myself…and to not worry about trying to go out of my way to look for companionship. “It will come when you least expect it,” they say.

Today I had another “special” moment.

I was involved in a nonwork-related meeting at lunch time. A new man that I didn’t know was in attendance and he happened to sit next to me.

He was quite fun to look at.

I mustered as much of my straight persona as I could because I just didn’t want my mind to go “there.” As we began to eat lunch, he turned to me.

“I’m Randy,” he said. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Likewise,” I said. “I’m Frank.”

We shook hands and he gave me one of those strong grips and he held it about a second longer than I was expecting.

As we continued talking and getting acquainted, I began to take notice of his body language. When he talked to me, his eyes looked at me intently – deeply, so much so that I felt naked. My heart raced.

I found out that he was a contractor. I happened to mention that I was thinking of having some work done at my house to remove a wall to free up a little more space for my refrigerator.

He grinned and said that he would like to give me an estimate, if that was okay.

I said that an estimate wouldn’t hurt.

So when the meeting was over, he asked me if I was heading out back to my office. When I said yes, he told me to wait up and he’d walk out with me.

We left the meeting place and when I got to my car, he asked if he could have my phone number and email address in order to make arrangements to look at the potential job. As I handed him the piece of paper, his eyes drilled into mine and he asked, “Are you married?”

Kind of a strange question… I said, “Well, sort of. I’m in the midst of a divorce…after over 25 years.”

He smiled….”I’m married too,” he said. “But I like guys. Wife doesn’t know. One thing though that is different about me is that I want monogamy. One guy…all the time.”

I gulped.

Was this a come on?

I smiled and said, “I totally understand. I’m gay too. I’m all for monogamy, but I’ve found it is rather difficult to find in the gay world.”

His smile grew broader.

“Small world,” he said.

It sure is….especially in Washington, D.C.

It makes me want to scream out like Joan Cusack in the movie, “In & Out”

“Is EVERYBODY gay?”

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

No everyone is not gay, but just enough to make life very interesting.

Anonymous said...

Wow, bold move from that guy. I like that. You sure you don't want some work done in the bedroom?

Bigg said...

I am so happy for the way things are turning out for you, Frank. You deserve all the good things that life can give you.

bear said...

(laughs@marlan) Nah,not everyone is gay, though like rick said.
My guess is that he might be interested, OR he has good gay-dar and totally knew you were "family"...if you're unsure he's interested in you, keep an eye out for suggestive language, flirting (it can be more subtle between guys sometimes) if you're not sure. It's easier to just be direct I think! ;)